Ég var stopp á rauðu ljósi í dag. Það gerist oft og svo sem ekki í frásögur færandi. En í dag hinsvegar var ég stopp fyrir aftan sælgætisbíl. Appollo lakkrís van-inn. Ég starði á hann í forundran. Bíllinn er þakinn myndum af lakkrísnum góða. Þær eru skýrar og fallegar. Svo raunverulegar að manni langar að dýfa hendinni ofan í lakkrísinn og fá sér handfylli af mjúkum nýjum lakkrís. Ég var farin yfir í Júmbó en ætla að skipta aftur á tyllidögum þegar ég leyfi mér svona munað. Reglulega góð og einföld markaðssetning. Þeir sem hafa séð bílinn skilja örugglega hvað ég meina. A.m.k. þeir með sykurtönn.
Mig langar í skó, gullskó. Litla sæta með engum hæl og svo aðra með hæl. Sá báða í dag. Mig langar líka í klippingu og litun. En það verður víst að bíða þangað til hárgreiðslukonan kemur heim úr ferðalaginu. Mig langar að Silvía Nótt komist áfram í undankeppninni því mig langar í Júróvision partý á laugardaginn. Mig langar að það verði gott veður í sumar. Þá ætla ég að fara mikið í sund. Mig langar að fara upp í sumarbústað, í pottinn og grilla. Langar, langar, langar.. mig langar margt. En er samt ótrúlega hamingjusöm. Ég hef allt sem ég þarf. Þarf samt ekki allt sem ég hef. En langar samt í gullskó, þó ég þurfi þá ekki. Voða væl er þetta, ég fer bara á morgun og kaupi mér gullskó. Punktur. My wallet's too small for my fifties, and my diamond shoes are too tight.. á vel við þessa færslu.
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ROSS: I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like a complete nightmare.
CHANDLER: Oh, I know. This must be so hard. Oh, no. Two women love me. They're both gorgeous and sexy. My wallet's too small for my fifties, and my diamond shoes are too tight.
CHANDLER: Ok, all right, look. Let's get logical about this, ok? We'll make a list. Rachel and Julie, pros and cons. Oh. We'll put their names in bold, with different fonts, and I can use different colors for each column.
ROSS: Can't we just use a pen?
CHANDLER: No, Amish boy.
JOEY: Ok, let's start with the cons, 'cause they're more fun. All right, Rachel first.
ROSS: I don't know. I mean, all right, I guess you can say she's a little spoiled sometimes.
JOEY: You could say that.
ROSS: And I guess, you know, sometimes, she's a little ditzy, you know. And I've seen her be a little too into her looks. Oh, and Julie and I, we have a lot in common 'cause we're both paleontologists, but Rachel's just a waitress.
CHANDLER: Waitress. Got it. You guys wanna play Doom? Or we could keep doing this. What else?
ROSS: I don't know.
JOEY: Oh, her ankles are a little chubby.
CHANDLER: Ok, let's do Julie. What's wrong with her?
ROSS: She's not Rachel.
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RACHEL: All right, you know what, that's fine. If you guys want to be children about this, that's fine. I do not need to see it. What is this? Ross, what is this?
CHANDLER: Good luck.
ROSS: Ok, just, just remember how crazy I am about you, ok?
RACHEL: Kind of ditzy? Too into her looks? Spoiled?
ROSS: Now that's a little spoiled. He was supposed to type "little", the idiot.
RACHEL: Just a waitress?
ROSS: No, that, that was, I mean, as opposed to uh, the uh, ok. Is this over yet Rache?
RACHEL: Oh! I do not have chubby ankles!
ROSS: No, no, wait, ok, ok, look at the other side. Look at Julie's column.
RACHEL: She is not Rachem. What the hell's a Rachem? Is that some stupid paleontology word that I wouldn't know because I'm just a waitress.
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PHOEBE: I, I cannot believe Ross even made this list. What a dinkus.
JOEY: Hey, cut him some slack. It was Chandler's idea.
PHOEBE & MONICA : What?
CHANDLER: Oh good, I was hoping that would come up.
MONICA: This was your idea?
PHOEBE: What were you thinking?
CHANDLER: All right, let's get some perspective here, ok? These things, they happen for a reason.
MONICA: Yeah. You!
CHANDLER: All right, Pheebs, back me up here, ok? You believe in that karma crap, don't you?
PHOEBE: Yeah, by the way, good luck in your next life as a dung beetle.
Ég tengi við Rachel. Ef ég væri Rachel þá væri Chandler kærastinn minn. Hann er fyndnastur.
Ég sakna Friends.
(e.s. gerði nýtt albúm alveg sjálf.. uss, bráðum fer ég að opna húdd og skipta um dekk.. nei djók, glætan)